????眾所周知，職場(chǎng)可不是適合放聲大哭的地方。但這種事有時(shí)候難免發(fā)生。你的憤怒或沮喪會(huì)變成淚水奪眶而出?；蛘哂型聲?huì)突然闖進(jìn)來(lái)，趴在你的辦公桌上啜泣不已。

????不論是自己流淚，還是看到別人流淚，面對(duì)這種意外情況，你該如何應(yīng)對(duì)？

????人們?yōu)槭裁磿?huì)在工作中哭泣？

????首先，我們需要找出人們?cè)谵k公室哭泣的原因。有時(shí)候，激烈的爭(zhēng)論或沖突會(huì)導(dǎo)致一方因?yàn)閼嵟蚓趩识鳒I。在面對(duì)壓力或感覺(jué)無(wú)能為力的時(shí)候，哭泣或許是一種很好的減壓方式?；蛟S，你只是因?yàn)閭€(gè)人的困難或生活中的損失而感到傷心。

????有時(shí)候，我們會(huì)因?yàn)閯e人頗具同情心的表情或傾聽(tīng)而忍不住流下淚水。華盛頓特區(qū)律師獵頭公司Garrison & Sisson的合伙人丹?賓斯托克就曾遇到過(guò)這種情況。賓斯托克為一個(gè)新工作崗位招聘的律師來(lái)到他的辦公室。這位律師此前剛剛通知現(xiàn)在律所的合伙人他要離開(kāi)，并為此深感內(nèi)疚。不一會(huì)兒，那個(gè)人便哭了起來(lái)。

????賓斯托克回憶道：“看得出來(lái)，他經(jīng)歷過(guò)一番折磨。這種令大家失望的感覺(jué)和其他人對(duì)他的反應(yīng)，深深影響著他。當(dāng)時(shí)他已經(jīng)極度敏感，因?yàn)橐鄱媾R巨大的壓力，這種情緒令他精疲力竭?！?/p>

????幾年前，盛德國(guó)際律師事務(wù)所（Sidley Austin）投資管理業(yè)務(wù)部的全球聯(lián)席主管勞林?布魯門(mén)塔爾?克萊曼，收到一個(gè)糟糕的通知：她第二個(gè)兒子就讀的學(xué)校拒絕在秋天繼續(xù)給他提供上學(xué)機(jī)會(huì)。兒子的特殊需求讓她很難找到合適的學(xué)校，而且當(dāng)時(shí)再去找其他學(xué)校已經(jīng)為時(shí)已晚?？巳R曼回憶道：“我們本來(lái)認(rèn)為他會(huì)在那里取得成功，根本沒(méi)有備選方案，結(jié)果卻被拋棄?！?/p>

????于是，她找老板請(qǐng)假，去解決孩子的擇校問(wèn)題和一些必須參加的會(huì)議。她說(shuō)道：“他看起來(lái)非常關(guān)心我的事，所以我禁不住哭了起來(lái)?！?/p>

????如何應(yīng)對(duì)淚水

????加州大學(xué)哈斯汀法學(xué)院（University of California Hastings School of Law）教授喬安?威廉姆斯建議，如果你因?yàn)楣ぷ鲉?wèn)題導(dǎo)致的沮喪而哭泣，不要忽視這種情況。相反，要說(shuō)出來(lái)：“我之所以在哭泣，是因?yàn)槲液苌鷼?。這就是我真正憤怒時(shí)候的樣子。”

????如果可以的話，把問(wèn)題擺在桌面上進(jìn)行討論。如果做不到，也不必道歉，但威廉姆斯表示，要告訴對(duì)方：“下面我們先中斷討論吧，因?yàn)槲野l(fā)現(xiàn)情況有些麻煩。如果我做好了繼續(xù)談話的準(zhǔn)備，我會(huì)告訴大家?！?/p>

????關(guān)鍵是要承認(rèn)導(dǎo)致自己情緒爆發(fā)的情感或環(huán)境，但沒(méi)有必要道歉。賓斯托克表示：“如果你開(kāi)始道歉，對(duì)方會(huì)感覺(jué)不舒服，這樣會(huì)讓兩個(gè)人都難受?！笔聦?shí)上，如果你是因?yàn)閷?duì)方的同情反應(yīng)而哭泣，“更沒(méi)有理由因?yàn)橛腥俗屇阈棺约旱那榫w而向?qū)Ψ奖硎厩敢狻！?/p>

????We all know the workplace isn’t the best place to cry. But sometimes it just happens. Your anger or frustration boils over into tears. Or perhaps a co-worker bursts in and sobs at your desk.

????Whether you’re on the giving or receiving end of unexpected waterworks, how do you handle this situation?

????Why people cry at work

????First, let’s address why people might cry in the office. Sometimes a heated argument or conflict will push one party to the point of tears, from anger or frustration. Or the sobs could come as a welcome release of tension from stress or feeling powerless. Maybe you’re simply sad because of a personal struggle or a loss in your life.

????Often, the tears bubble to the surface because someone gives a sympathetic look or ear. That’s what happened to Dan Binstock, a partner at attorney search firm Garrison & Sisson in Washington D.C. A lawyer whom Binstock had recruited to a new job came into the office after giving notice to his current partners and being subjected to a guilt trip for leaving them. In just a few minutes, the man started crying.

????“I could tell he had been through the wringer,” Binstock recalls. “It was that feeling of disappointing everyone and how they were manipulating him. It wore him out at a time when he was already extremely sensitive and had a lot of stress from moving his practice.”

????Some years ago, Laurin Blumenthal Kleiman, global co-head of Sidley Austin’s investment management practice, received the unwelcome news that her middle son’s school wouldn’t offer him a place in the fall. Her son’s special needs had made finding the right educational fit a challenge in the first place, and it was a time of year when it was too late to find another school placement easily. “He was being tossed from the one environment where we thought he could succeed and there was no alternative,” Kleiman recalls.

????She approached her boss to ask for time away from work so she could manage the school search and mandatory meetings. “He looked so concerned that I just started weeping,” she says.

????How to respond to tears

????If you’re crying because of frustration with a work issue, don’t ignore the situation, advises Joan Williams, professor at the University of California Hastings School of Law. Instead, say, “When I’m crying, it’s because I’m pissed. This is what it looks like when I am really outraged.”

????Continue speaking about the issue on the table if you physically can. If not, don’t apologize, but say, “now we’re going to discontinue this discussion because I find what happened just that troubling. I’ll let you know when I’m ready to continue this conversation,” Williams says.

????The key is to acknowledge the emotion or the circumstances that led to your outburst, but don’t apologize for it. “When you start apologizing, it takes one person’s discomfort and makes two people uncomfortable,” Binstock says. Indeed, if you’re crying because of a sympathetic response, “there’s no reason to apologize that you feel comfortable enough with someone to let your emotions out.”