披薩成了健康食品

????好吧，其實(shí)，國(guó)會(huì)只是裁定蕃茄醬屬于健康蔬菜，但是這對(duì)公眾沒(méi)什么兩樣，人們已經(jīng)認(rèn)定披薩就是蔬菜。國(guó)會(huì)的裁決認(rèn)為蕃茄醬具有營(yíng)養(yǎng)價(jià)值——八分之一杯的蕃茄醬與半杯蔬菜的營(yíng)養(yǎng)價(jià)值相同——當(dāng)然，這對(duì)我們對(duì)抗困擾全美、威脅人們健康的肥胖癥沒(méi)什么幫助。但是，如果真的有世界末日，我們不妨做個(gè)飽死鬼。

Pizza is a vegetable

????Okay, sure, it's really that Congress merely upheld a ruling about tomato paste, but that hasn't made a difference to the general public, which has decided that pizza is now a vegetable. The ruling credits tomato paste with having nutritional value-- one eighth of a cup has as much value as a half-cup of veggies--which certainly won't help us reverse the obesity epidemic plaguing our country's people. But hey, if the world might be ending, we may as well pig out.